There is a lot of pressure on new mums and everyone likes to offer their two cents worth of advice.
After my second baby was born I was in the supermarket with my mum. An acquaintance of hers came up to say hello and to admire the new baby. As she cooed over my baby she said, "Oh it's another girl - that's a shame."My mother and I looked at each other, not quite knowing what to say!
I know I am not the only one who has had things like this happen.
We have all heard, "Oh give that baby a bottle." "Are you not breastfeeding?" That baby is tired." "Why are you putting the baby to bed, they aren't tired."
This is why I think it is important for mums to trust their own instincts. To do what they want to do.
As a brand new mum, it can take a little bit of time for your confidence to trust yourself kicks in. But it is there and its just waiting to come out.
Now I am not saying don't listen to advice, we all have wonderful friends and family members who give great advice, who we look up to as mums and whose parenting skills we want to emulate. By all means, ask them for tips and information. Get their support!
I'm talking about the Judgy McJudgesons who offer unsolicited advice, that we don't even want!
These are the people that put mums off asking for help and seeking advice when they need it. Of course, often these are people in the street, or in my case in the supermarket, but sometimes they are friends or close family members, and dare I say it... Mother's in Laws. (Not mine I might add - she is wonderful).
You may need to learn to let the comments slide. Acting serenely on the outside, while seething on the inside. Or learn to pick your battles. They may only need to be told once to BACK OFF.
This usually comes down to the types of relationships you have and how well you know the person.
As a mama, you know what is best for your baby, and your family. Trust your own instincts, they are there for a reason. As you and your baby get to know each other they get stronger and stronger.
Trust that as you will know when to ask for help and when you just need to tell someone to back off.
This is your baby and you know what is best for the both of you!